Evan's Birth Story
On Wed. morning, I woke up around 6:30 am to some cramps and having to pee. I thought I had a stomach bug or something too, since I had diarrhea the day before. The thought of impending labor never crossed my mind since I had gone to almost 43 weeks with Bella, and here I was not quite 37 weeks. Curiosity had gotten the better of me a few days before, and I tried to check my cervix but was unable to reach it. Intuitively, I had known all along that I wouldn’t make it to March, but after going so “late” with Bella, I didn’t want to allow that thought into my mind. So, at 6:30, I get out of bed to pee, knowing that my odds were not good being in a house with 5 people and 1 bathroom. Sure enough, it was occupied, so I folded my robe up and sat on it to pee. I put it in the hamper with our dirty diapers, and got back into bed. As I get back into bed, I notice my leg pillow is slightly wet and wonder if I should call Eric and tell him my water is leaking, but I decide against it. I would feel silly calling him if I had only peed myself, so I decide not to, fully expecting to have another 3-4 weeks of pregnancy. I put on my Hypnobabies tracks that I was supposed to listen to that day, since they always put me right to sleep. Around 6:45, I wake up, having to pee again. Walking to the bathroom, it seems as though I have lost control of my bladder, as I feel liquid trickle down my leg. I get into the bathroom, and the trickle is red. Hmm. I guess my water did break. The thought of labor crosses my mind as a REAL possibility for the first time. I go out to the living room, and tell my mom to call Eric and have him come home since my water broke. I’m still feeling crampy, and although I never timed my contractions, I wondered if there was a pattern, and if they were getting longer/stronger/closer together. Figuring I have a LONG way to go, I start a bath around 7am. I call my dad (Bella’s support person), and my midwife. Bella wakes up, and my mom gets her and brings her into the bathroom. She decides to get in with me. I worry she’ll want to nurse, and I don’t want to, but she doesn’t. I start to feel nauseous, and feel like I have to poop. I hop on the toilet, have diarrhea again, and then go into my bedroom. I only make it to the foot of my bed before a contraction comes and the pressure is killing my lower back. They start coming one on top of another, so I kneel at the foot of the bed and lean on it with my upper body. I breathe heavily and try to use my hypno-cues, but the intensity is scaring me and I can’t quite get a hold of myself. I feel like I’m going to puke, so I ask my mom (now in the bathroom tending to my bathing 2 year old for a bowl. I end up grabbing a trashcan that is behind me and as I vomit, I realize I’m pooping again. I momentarily feel bad that someone is going to have to clean up my adult feces, but quickly get over it as the next wave of contractions come. I wonder if I could be in transition, and pray that’s what it is, because I don’t feel any control whatsoever, and am intimidated by the power I feel. The pressure is insane, and while I’m making some noises, I don’t know that I can say I was ever in PAIN, but I was profoundly uncomfortable, and could not find a position that felt good. I tell my mom we’re going to the hospital. Part of me wants to tune out with an epidural like I did with Bella, and part of me is afraid for his lungs being slightly under 37 weeks. I realize I would just be pissed off to get to the hospital only to not have time for drugs. Around 7:45 am Eric gets home and started using hypno-cues, applying pressure to my back and encouraging me. I told him “I don’t want to”, and he continues to say all the right things. I get my mom to put on my birth guide CD, remembering that I have to choose to use my hypno-training. It starts to help, and I get my switch to center and feel much more comfortable. Then the CD starts skipping. (I was supposed to listen to it at 37 weeks to make sure it worked, but hadn’t gotten there yet). I tell him to make it shut up, and after the next contraction I go to the tub. It’s now about 8:15. I turn on the water and hand held shower head. I hand him the shower and he puts it on my back. I’m on hands and knees again, and my wrists are starting to get tired. I’m totally relaxed and comfortable, with no pain for the next 15 minutes. I then start to feel a lot of pressure and stretching with each contraction. Then this loud unearthly noise is coming from somewhere. I realize it’s me and think to myself, I must be pushing. That low cavewoman type Tarzan bellow comes out of me with each contraction. I never consciously push; my body just does it all. I reach down and feel his head. I holler for no one to touch me, and while my mom says no one is, I know they were, and she continued to for about 30 more seconds. The head is out; I continue bellowing and pushing and then he is out. It is 8:42 am. I look back, and my midwife is here. She has the biggest smile on her face. She apparently got here just after the head was out, and undid his double nuchal cord just in time for his body to slip out. She helps me sit back and hold him. He has trouble breathing. She gives him a few breaths and some oxygen to get him started. He is bright red and grunty for the next 18 hours. We get me to the bed, and I feel pushy, so we try to deliver the placenta, but it’s not ready. I’m hot and nauseous, and although we were planning a lotus birth, he is so cold and needing so much warming that I ask to cut the cord so they can take him aside and warm him up. They do, and they open a window for me so I cool down. At 9:45 I deliver the placenta, and Eric and the midwife go to the living room to keep him happy. I start to black out. I see stars, and call for Karen. She comes in and looks at me and says… Pitocin? I say I don’t feel so good… and then go blank. They ask me to open my eyes, and I do, in time to see her jab me with a needle in my thigh. Almost 2 hours go by before I feel strong enough to hold my baby, and while I feel somewhat remorseful about missing that time, I know he was being held and loved by my dad and my husband, and being well cared for. Karen asks to supplement with some sugar water, hoping that will help with the gruntiness. I tell them where the finger feeder is, and it does help quite a bit. We supplement for the next 24 hours or so. His breathing is always better when nursing, and I’m able to give him supplement at the same time. My milk was in by 48 hours, and he nurses really well. I had a breast reduction a year before my daughter was born, and had to supplement with formula. I really hope to be able to provide for all of his nutritive needs. He is peeing and pooping just like the books say he should, and that makes me feel soooo good. I’m taking fenugreek, which helped a lot with my daughter as well. My sister had my daughter for most of the time. They played in the living room until I started bellowing. Bella got concerned and asked what was wrong. My sister told her “mommy’s just singing a song”, and they start singing with me. They play in the hallway for a while, and tell the midwives which door to go in (apartment). About 15 minutes after he is born, Bella comes in to sit on her daddy’s lap in the bathroom. Everything was as it should be. I was dropped by a CNM at 30 weeks for a message I posted on a discussion board, and I know that was a godsend. I’m sure we would have ended up with a hospital transfer because of his breathing, and he would have been hooked up in the NICU with spinal taps and IV’s and all. I’m also very grateful we planned a homebirth, because I don’t think we would have made it anywhere anyway. I can’t say enough about my midwives. Their presence and professionalism and knowledge and kindness were so perfect. The whole thing was perfect. The only thing I would change is my mother not keeping her hands to herself. Looking back, I’m still not sure if I had a quick labor, or because of Hypnobabies was deep in hypnosis for the early stage.
Evander 7/21/07, 8lbs 6 oz, 20.5 inches.
Eric’s Version
Well, it all started for me with a phone call from my MIL Kathi. It was Wed morning, just before 7 am on February 21, 2007. I would have thought that maybe I would have been a little nervous or scared to hear Trish’s water had broken almost a month before our supposed “due date,” but I wasn’t scared or nervous or worried at all. My first reaction was to get home to Trish and check to see how she was doing and if she was following the Hypnobabies scripts to a pain free birth. Trish had put in a lot of time studying, reading, meditating and relaxing to train her body and follow the principles of Hypnobabies. Trish was very disappointed with her support system and hospital staff for the birth of Bella. I wanted to get home to make sure this was a more pleasurable experience for her. On my way home, I received two more phone calls from Kathi stating that Trish was in intense labor already, and her mental state was fragile. So, when I walked in the door to find her on all fours and in pain, I was not surprised. She immediately beckoned me over to touch her and start speaking hypno to her. I was having a hard time remembering the words to the script since I had only read it to her one time. The whole overall experience was wonderful and amazing, but when she pooped while I was putting pressure on her lower back was not very appealing. This is how the home portion of the home birth began for me, but it was about to get better. For the next half hour or so, we alternated between positions for Trish on the bed and me pushing on her back. I was thinking sometime soon it would be nice if the midwives showed up because I really wanted this homebirth to be special for her, and I didn’t think I was saying the right things to help her relax. She seemed to be in pain and struggling to stay sane and relax for this time on the bed. I tried putting in a Hypnobabies CD, but this did not help either. Trish then decided it was off to the tub, so I went to draw a bath and waited until she was ready to go. Little did I know that I was about to experience the most amazing natural act: birth. There was still no midwife yet, so it was just Trish and myself in the bathroom. Kathi, Missy and Bella played around in the living room, and Kathi would pop her head in every five minutes or so. Trish was on all fours as the water filled the tub, and I was in charge of showering her lower back with the nozzle shower spray to help ease her pain. For about 15 minutes, this moving to the shower seemed to be working very well as Trish was relaxing both mentally and physically. I was very calm and quiet during this shower/tub phase. Trish then began to utter out these deep guttural primordial groans every few minutes. It never crossed my mind at this point that she was pushing with each birthing wave and that within 15 minutes we would meet “mini E.” Within no time at all it seemed as if we progressed rapidly and Trish was groaning and moaning (a very uncomfortable sound) every minute or so. It was just past 8:30 am and Kathi walked in and said “we might be having this baby anytime, is there a head yet?” I looked down and to my surprise there was Mini E’s top of the head. Kathi quickly got of the phone and rushed in as I put my hands around the head and inside the vagina to try and help the head come out. Kathi also put her hands down to assist with the head, and I pulled my hands away as Trish screamed “Don’t touch me.” Kathi continued assisting for about 30 seconds until the whole head popped out and Karen came in the bathroom to finish the job. Evan’s head was purple with a brown patch of hair on top. The cord was around his neck, and it looked like he was struggling to breathe. I remember thinking it seems strange or paradoxical that the baby would be born in water coming from a water filled sack, but my first reaction is get him out of the water before he drowns. Strange indeed, two more groans and little E had entered the world. The cord was removed from his neck, but there was no gasping for air scream like I remembered with Bella. Instead, there was a grunting sound and Evan was bright red. His breathing and heart were good, but the fast labor was making it difficult for him to breathe and it seemed he wasn’t getting enough oxygen. This was the cause for the severe red coloration of his skin and grunting sounds. He was so amazing and beautiful. Trish had done such an amazing job in such a short amount of time. I thought we were hours away from the birth and here he was at 8:42 am. Less than 2 hours after I got that phone call that her water had broken, a new person was born into this world. Even though they were less than a pound different, Bella seemed to be twice as big when she was born. Bella was now too curious to wait around outside, and she came in and sat on my lap and watched Evan squirm around on Trish’s lap. Bella was extremely confused at the sight of a human being in mommy’s lap that hadn’t been here a minute before. It took about an hour for Bella to make the connection that Evan had come out of Mommy, and she was a big sister now. She has been a wonderful helper and big sister as she adjusts to her new role in the family. Sharing the weps (her term for nursing) has been difficult for her. As well as grasping how fragile Evan is. Our family is so awesome, I love them all.