Kyan's Birth

Even though there is some discussion of discomfort, Hypnobabies worked wonders for me. I didn't start until 35 weeks so didn't get in the practice I should have, and I had no one doing the birth partner scripts. I am definitely using this program for my next birth, knowing it can only get better!
 

I took the Hypnobabies homestudy course, but did not start until I was 35 weeks along.  I did the course alone and did not even talk to my DH about it.  My husband is wonderfully supportive about most things, but he is pretty mainstream and the hypnosis just seems to “weird”  and out there for him.    I tried to get him on board with hypnosis for the first two births, but he was not comfortable with it and just did not think it would work.  There were no childbirth hypnosis classes in our area,  so I had very few tools available to me for my first two births (also unmedicated)  When I found the homestudy course, I was so excited.  DH was aware of what I was doing but I minimized my discussions about the hypnosis tools I would be using.   I did not want to have to constantly deal with comments about this being a waste of time and money and it won’t work etc, etc.    But he would take care of our other two children while I practiced and in the end, I described the relax cue to him and asked him to use it, which he did.

I loved practicing with the CDs even though I felt rushed because I was so close to the end of my pregnancy.  I did two CDs per day instead of one and listened to the pregnancy affirmations whenever I was in the car.  I found that I slept better and was calmer and more patient in general.   Even if the Hypnobabies course did not help with the birth, it would have been worth it for the way it helped me feel during pregnancy.   The only thing I did not do well was practicing the finger drop and eyes open hypnosis techniques.  But even with all the obstacles (nobody doing the birth partner scripts, not starting until 35 weeks, not practicing as much as I should have) Hypnobabies still worked wonders for me.

I started feeling birthing waves at about four o’clock on January 16.  It took a few times before I was convinced that these were not just BH.  They seemed rather erratic in nature, no real pattern, but with the BH, I would only get a few per day and these just kept coming.   I was really undecided through this whole process, I just couldn’t tell if this was labor or how far along I was.  I finally called hubby at work and told him to get someone to cover for him the next day because it would probably be that night.  I spent the first five hours of labor (from four to 9:00) doing nothing different than normal.  I helped my mom fix dinner, played with the kids, got them ready for bed.  I stopped what I was doing when a birthing wave would come, but I could still talk or even move through them.  I tried to do the fingerdrop technique but there were too many distractions.  My mom kept asking me about  my “pains”  until I asked her to stop using that word.  And my 15 year old step daughter kept saying “how can you be so calm?  I would be freaking out.  I heard about so and so…..” and on and on until I locked myself in the bathroom and visualized my bubble of peace .  I changed my bubble so that it wasn’t see through and then I started imagining lasers coming out from the bubble, destroying any negative comment in the air before it could reach me.   OK, so I watch too much Star Trek, but it worked for me and I felt calmer.  About 8:30, I nursed my two year old to sleep during which time I had several birthing waves.  By this time I had to focus.  I did the fingerdrop, and kept repeating ‘relax’ to myself.   I found that I preferred ‘relax’ over the peace cue.  I also talked to the baby and would also say “another hug for you and me”  when each wave would come.  I can’t say that it felt like pressure and I would describe the sensation as uncomfortable, but I felt that I was still in early stage of labor because the sensation was so mild.

I needed to be alone at this point so I left my four year old with my mom and went upstairs.  I tried the birth ball for a while as well as doing the fingerdrop and trying to go into off position.  I didn’t like it.  I wanted to move during birthing waves.  So I ended up moving myself to ‘off’ between waves and bringing myself up to center when a wave would come.  It worked for me. At this point I started listening to the Birth Affirmations CD and found that I just didn’t want to listen to it.  It wasn’t helping at all.  In retrospect, I believe the reason for this was because I was too far into labor. I instead put in the birth guide CD and that was wonderful!  I listened to this on and off until just before transition.   

 I wanted to sway leaning over the bed or against the wall during a wave, so I continued to go “off” between waves and up to center during waves.  I also took a shower for a while which felt good.  Hubby came home at 9:30 and had to cuddle with our daughter for a while because she doesn’t go to bed well without me.  He finally got her to sleep, then joined me to time waves.  He was in and out checking on me, packing the car and emailing friends on my progress.   I was starting to get worried that I was stalled in some way because they all felt so mild.  I heard that some Hypno moms are deceived by the mild feel of the birthing waves and are further along than they think.  This definitely happened to me.  I don’t remember the exact time, but some time after  DH arrived home, we timed some waves and they were regular and 5 minutes apart.  I had heard stories of women having these mild feeling birthing waves for hours on end that don’t do anything to dilate the cervix.  Or women who spend hours stalled at 3 cm.  I truly was thinking that might be happening to me.  At 11:00 contractions were 3 minutes apart and 60 seconds in duration. Some were more intense than others—the milder ones I started calling “aftershocks”.  I had never experienced anything like this.   I was in the tub and DH and I had this conversation trying to decide if we should call the midwife.  3 minutes and 60 seconds and we were “undecided”. DH thought I couldn’t possibly be too far along because I was “handling it too well”.  He has seen me during active labor before and sitting quietly, whispering to myself was not what it had looked like.  This is the wonder of Hypnobabies.  To me, it still felt like early stage labor, based on my previous two unmedicated  childbirth experiences.  I finally called the midwife and described everything.  She said it sounded like active labor and we should come in.  We left for the birth center just after midnight.  Right before we left, I would stop and sway during contractions, but I was walking around and talking to DH and my mom between waves.  I even walked around during some of them.   This was so different from my last birth—at that one, my midwife took me out walking and it took every ounce of strength I had to walk through those birthing waves. I listened to the birth Guide CD all the way to the birth center.

When we got there, the midwives wanted to take my vitals and they sat beside me through some waves—I was completely silent during these, listening to the Birth guide CD.  My midwife asked me to describe what was going on with me—I said I felt pressure in my rectum during the birthing wave.  Her response to this was “You are probably further along than you appear to be.”    I was afraid to be checked because I was sure I wasn’t more than four cm.  The birthing waves were becoming painful—very manageable discomfort, but I was tired and the thought of doing this for several more hours was very discouraging.  At about 1:30  she checked me and I was 6 1//2 cm!  I was so excited and relieved.   The birthing waves all of a sudden got easier to deal with.   I was tensing up now during waves, losing focus and I didn’t want the CD anymore—couldn’t concentrate.  But I had put myself in “center” one last time before we left the house and I believe I stayed there throughout the rest of labor. I talked myself through each wave with the relax cue and visualizing my cervix opening.   It felt like no time at all before I was feeling an intense urge to push.  It was actually a little over an hour.

I was checked and she said I was fully dialated, but I had a cervical lip.  I wanted to cry because I had read in other birth stories that to push past a cervical lip while the midwife holds it back is very painful.  I was tired and easily discouraged at this point.  The midwives said that we could either wait for a few more waves before I started to push or she could reach in and hold that last bit of cervix out of the way while I pushed past it.  I told her she would have to do that because there was no way I could keep from pushing at this point.   To my surprise, the procedure wasn’t as unpleasant as I thought it would be.  Pushing is never my favorite part and was very very difficult during my last birth because my last child had not turned all the way.  I know I carried some fear from that experience into this birth, even though I had tried to let it go.

When the baby came down the birth canal, I did feel an incredible amount of pressure.  I can’t say that it was pleasant or comfortable.  I had lost my focus and was not using any Hypnobabies techniques.  I didn’t even think about listening to the pushing baby out CD.  At this point, I was fighting my body which I’m sure made it harder on me.  Despite all that, I felt in control.  I was able to talk to DH and the midwife between pushes.  I really felt like I had complete control over when and how my baby came down that birth canal.  My midwife was wonderful,  she kept saying “I know how you feel, I’ve been there, I know you don’t like it but you are so close”  She massaged my perineum and put very warm cloths on it, telling me “push into the warmth”  That warmth was just heavenly.  I pushed for twenty minutes  and had only one tiny tear—no stitches.  And then I had my baby boy. 

The only thing I regret slightly is that I didn’t give birth in the tub.  My last was a waterbirth and I had wanted that this time as well.  After I had pushed past the cervical lip, they asked me if I wanted to get in the tub.  But by that time, the baby was halfway down the birth canal and I just felt like there was no way I could get up and walk across the room.  So I stayed where I was.  She had me in a hands and knees position to move the lip and I had my head down on a pillow.  I just didn’t want to move so I gave birth just like that.  DH said later that I should have at least gone to a side lying position so I wouldn’t be fighting gravity and he was right because my bottom was up in the air the whole time.

DH was amazed at the calm manner in which I handled this birth and told me that he felt like he really had nothing to do.  I think next time he will be more willing to participate, now that he has seen what this program can do.  I am looking forward to using Hypnobabies with my next birth, I know it will be even better.