Nathan's Birth

Nathan’s Birth: Our Story

March 14, 2006.  Approx. 2:30 pm.  I was finishing up lunch with my parents and about to leave the restaurant when I felt a little trickle from my vagina.

“You know…I’m going to stop in the restroom; I’ll meet you guys outside.”

As I got up and walked back to the bathroom the trickle got a little stronger, and by the time I was in a stall, it had become more of a gush.  My mobile phone had died and was at home charging, so I couldn’t call my husband Brian yet.  So I tried to a) clean up as best I could and b) not completely freak out that this was it!!!

I walked out to where my parents were and, as calmly as possible said, “Can one of you call Brian?  My water just broke.”  Upon which my mom opened the door to the restaurant and told the ladies there, whom she had been chatting with about my pregnancy, that my water broke.  Of course, excitement ensued.  I got situated in the car (my parents actually had one of those hospital pads in the back of their car for me to sit on – apparently originally intended for my grandmother who no longer has the best bladder control – which was a crack up) and I called Brian as we drove back to my house.

“Hi…my water just broke.”

[Stupidest question of all time] “Do you want me to come home now?”

“Uh…yeah!”

I got home and packed the last of my things for the hospital (and went through a number of very large absorbent maxi pads) and Brian got home and took a shower.  I wasn’t having any regular pressure waves yet, but I called my doctor to let her know what was going on.  She just wanted to confirm that the fluid was clear (it was) and said that I could stay at home a bit longer if I liked; she’d call the hospital and let them know to expect me around 5 or 6.  And she suggested that I do a little walking to get things going.

I didn’t really have time to thaw and bake the cookie dough that I had prepared for the nurses, so I sent my dad to a bakery that makes great cookies and decided to bring those.  My parents (who live about an hour away in San Diego) had packed bags of their own “just in case” and they left to check in to a hotel for the night!

It was nice to just be with Brian…so much more low-key (and the reason I hadn’t planned to call my parents until after the baby had been born).  I put my birthing affirmations CD into my headphones and we took a leisurely walk around the block together.  We got back home and Brian packed up the car and after a quick stop at the bank (for parking/cafeteria money, just in case) we went to the hospital.  It was about 5:30 pm at this point.

We checked in; I changed into a hospital gown and they did a few minutes of monitoring and confirmed that I was leaking amniotic fluid.  A couple of mild pressure waves showed up on the monitor at first, but everything at this point felt like menstrual cramps – nothing very strong or regular still.  My doctor came in to check up on me (she had a couple of other patients in L&D at the same time) and was planning to check my cervix, but since I had ruptured and was “not in active labor yet,” she decided not to.  She said that we could eat dinner, should try and get some rest and that she’d be back first thing in the morning to check me.  She would want to start me on Pitocin once I had been there for 24 hours if nothing was happening, so I was halfway dreading a long road ahead, although she thought that I probably just needed 12 hours or so to get things going.  At this point, nothing was showing up on the contraction-monitor, although I was feeling a little crampy from time to time.

Brian and I walked the halls a little, ate our hospital dinners, watched a little television and decided to try and get some sleep at around 10 pm or so.  I couldn’t really sleep, and I didn’t want to use my CDs too soon (which was dumb thinking, in hindsight) so I just talked myself through some of the relaxation/hypnobabies tools I had been practicing.  As I was relaxing and trying to sleep, lightswitch off, I felt my nose running; but I didn’t want to switch back to center, so I let it go.  When I did open my eyes and move again, it turned out I had a bloody nose.  Strange.

March 15, 2006.  At about midnight, I noticed that the crampy feeling was really turning into waves that would come and go – about every 5 minutes.  But the monitoring equipment still didn’t show anything happening.  At one point Brian had said to me, “You know your body better than that equipment does,” and told me not to doubt what I was feeling.  Very wise.  During each wave I would count backward from 10 – inhaling to a number and exhaling to the word “peace.”  I liked doing this because a) both the counting and the peace would help relax me, and b) if it started to get intense (and it did later), I knew that I just had to make it through those 10 numbers.

At 1:00 am, my nurse came in to check on me and I told her that I felt contractions, about every five minutes, but noticed that they weren’t showing up on the monitor.  I mentioned that the belt with the monitor felt high, whereas I was feeling the waves much lower.  She tried repositioning the belt, but mentioned that the uterus contracts from the top down, which was why they usually placed the monitor there.  She ended up trying to reposition it several more times during the night, never with any luck.

The next two hours were pretty frustrating for me, as I felt pressure waves, growing in intensity, but never showing up on the monitor.  And I had to go to the bathroom a lot – every half hour turned into every 15 minutes (and not just #1).  It actually reminded me of being up sick in the middle of the night, where you’re all alone (Brian was sleeping at this point) and feel crummy and just wish you could get some sleep.

By about 3:00 am, things were getting pretty intense.  I remember sitting on the toilet at one point, wondering how much longer, and more intense things would get.  I couldn’t help but wonder if this was transformation, but since I hadn’t been checked, I could only be at 3 or 4 centimeters for all I knew (in which case I didn’t know how I would make it through).  I decided that it was no longer “too early” to listen to my birth guide CD, although all of my bathroom trips were pretty distracting.  And by about 3:30, Brian was up with a pretty frustrated, miserable me.  He at first said that it would be okay if I needed something for pain, and I told him not to say that (after that he was an awesome cheerleader, telling me that I could do it, was doing it, and was doing really great).  The weird thing was, it really wasn’t painful; I even remember thinking that when I thought I couldn’t do it, pain medication wouldn’t have even helped, because that wasn’t the problem.  I kept taking Brian into the bathroom with me (poor guy), but it wasn’t long before there was nothing left to do in there.  I still felt like I had to go though.  He picked up on this and wondered (as I had in my head) if this was really the urge to push.  I had a hard time getting into a comfortable position, but he brought a popsicle for us to share, and I ate it sitting on my ball, which wasn’t too bad.  Then I wanted to go to the bathroom again.  Of course, I didn’t really have to go.  Now I noticed that the bloody mucous I had been having was more like blood now.  What does that mean?

Not much later, another nurse came in.  I told her about the blood and she said that that just meant that my cervix was changing (a good sign).  I told her about my feeling to need to go to the bathroom, also.  She offered to check me, and I accepted (this would be the moment of truth…please be at least 7!)

“Hold on…I just need to check it all to be sure……almost 10.”

“What?!”

“You’re almost 10. We’ll call your doctor.”

Woo hoo!!!  I was going to make it.  That had been transformation.

Now I was hoping that my doctor would come right over and I’d just have to push the baby out and he’d be here.  Unfortunately that wasn’t quite the case.  Instead the nurses told me to start pushing a little on my own, so that baby’s head would descend (at the instruction of my doc – who could be there in 15 minutes once it was really time to start pushing.  I think it must have been around 4:30 or 5 at this point.

My nurse said, “I guess your doctor was right – or rather you were – you just needed a little time to get things going!” and then told me to try this pushing in any position that I liked, so I moved to my hands and knees on the bed, with my arms/head up at the top of the bed (it was positioned more like a chair).  I liked that this position helped relieve the pressure I was feeling, but it was a bit tiring after a while.  At this point Brian was fanning me (I felt really hot – like you do when you’re sick) and I tried pushing down a little.

With that head moving down, the pressure got more and more intense.  Brian would remind me to breathe, because the pressure made it difficult to exhale…or at least difficult to exhale quietly…some of the strangest noises came out of me as I did – some sounded like sheep or other animals and even like a newborn baby crying!  I even heard some people making fun of me out in the hallway!  When I mentioned this to Brian between pressure waves, he admitted that he was trying not to laugh and I admitted that I thought it was pretty funny and sheep-like, too.

After about an hour of this, which was very tiring, we asked the nurse when the doctor would come so I could push for real.  They checked me again (apparently you have to let them know what’s going on or they’ll just leave you be) and the head was low enough to call the doctor in…yeay!

A little after 6:00 am, my doctor arrived and started to get situated.  She asked if I’d like a little direction on pushing the baby out, and because I didn’t quite feel sure about what to do (and was ready to have this baby!), I had her help me out.  I was lying on my back to push (which was fine…I think I was too tired to try more hands and knees or squatting) and the bed had little pedals to put my feet on (she said there wasn’t any need for stirrups).  She sat in the middle to help support my perineum once I started to push, the nurse was on my right side to support one leg, and Brian was on my left leg.  There were a few other nurses in the room also, I think partly because shifts were going to change at about 7:00, partly because a “nursery” nurse had come in with the scale and baby warmer to get the baby cleaned up and checked out after he was born, and honestly I think a few extra nurses were interested to see a natural birth!

I would say that I started pushing around 6:20 am.  I had always heard that it was such a relief to be able to push, but at the same time it was a little scary.  Again, there was a little back & forth in my head – between “this is what my body was designed to do” and “there’s no way a baby will fit through my vagina.”  At one point the nurse picked up on my apprehension, mentioning that I would start off with a strong push, but end up backing off a bit in hesitation.  There was a slight burning sensation, but nothing too bad.

Because it was morning and we had left the blinds open in the room, the natural sunlight was coming in and I remember finding it so peaceful and nice.  My doctor (she’s great) was very calm and laid back – I remember we would make small talk between pushes, which was relaxing.  I would just push when I felt the need to and they would pick up on that cue.  Both the doctor and nurse were great at gently encouraging me to push – they had mentioned beforehand that they usually count to ten through each push, so I kept that in mind (and basically just pushed as long and hard as I could each time) but they didn’t need to count for me or do any over-zealous coaching.  Instead, they would tell me of my progress as the head started to crown (a little more after each push) and that I was stretching really well.  And it was great to have Brian involved, by supporting both my leg on one side and helping support my head and back so that I could curl up and really bear down with some good pushes.

On what ended up being my final round of pushes, the doctor told me that I could scream if I wanted to…sounds odd, but somehow a primal “battle cry” was exactly what I needed!  With a big push and a loud scream I felt the head come through (and everyone confirmed that it was coming out!) – wow!  The doctor checked for the cord and let me know once his shoulders were in a position where they could be pushed out (although once that head was out, it was all a piece of cake from then forward).  Another push and I felt his shoulders and little body slide right out – what a sensation that was!  And then the doctor lifted my little peanut right up (an image I will always remember) and laid him on my belly.  It was 7:06 am.  I thought, “I can’t believe I did that!”  Once the cord was clamped and ready to be cut, the doctor had Brian do the honors.

Then I noticed that they were turning the bright light on, which I knew meant that I needed stitches (I actually wouldn’t have known otherwise – it wasn’t something that I could feel).  The doctor did give me an injection of local anesthetic (which actually wore off halfway through the stitches, although even the stitches weren’t that painful.  I think she did end up giving me a second injection, though) and worked on stitching me up, while Brian helped the nurses get Nathan checked and cleaned up – I was glad that “Dad” was able to give him his first little sponge bath and hair-do.  Nathan weighed 6 pounds and 9.5 ounces (the doctor told me later that the reason I tore and needed stitches was that he had his little hands up by his face when he came out!) and was 19 inches long.  I’m pretty sure his Apgar scores were 8 and 9.

Once I was stitched up and the placenta was ready to come out, I gave an additional push and felt something big and slimy slide out of my vagina – another strange but interesting sensation.  Then the nurse began to “massage” my uterus (note: this is basically them just pushing really hard on your abdomen) and I felt another slightly smaller “thing” come out – apparently a big blood clot…ew.  Because I had passed such a large clot with some bleeding, and already had a hep-lock put in when they drew blood the night before, we decided to go ahead with a small dose of IV Pitocin to help control the bleeding (also, it took us a while to get the hang of breastfeeding).

At this point all I had to do was sit back, relax and enjoy my family!  The nurses and the doctors all mentioned how impressed they were with my labor & delivery (somewhat to my surprise, as there were times that I felt I wasn’t “doing very well”) – one nurse said that I was her hero (she had 4 children – all born with epidurals), and my doctor said that she would be telling her other patients about Hypnobabies (I was her first experience with such a program).  So I guess I did really well after all!  I mean, I couldn’t complain – I had been able to have a relatively quick, completely natural birthing, and I had such the perfect reward – my beautiful baby boy!

My tips for Hypnomoms…

 My final thoughts…

 So…did Hynobabies work for me?  Yeah.  I have to admit that it wasn’t always comfortable or easy (or quiet), but it wasn’t painful either.  And when it was a little rough, it’s because of what was going on in my head, not so much my body, although the pressure of that head descending is intense!  And even though I was a little disappointed that I didn’t use the tools I had learned to their full potential during the birthing (and that’s because I let the circumstances “get in my way”), I think it helped my pregnancy (which was great from start to finish) go really well, and, most of all, I think my body knew exactly what to do because of the program.  My story overall reminds me more of a 2^nd pregnancy/childbirth than a first – my cervix had started changing at 35 weeks, I gave birth at 39 weeks, and I felt like everything progressed fairly quickly during by birthing time (whether or not I knew it at the time).  After hearing of many other first-timers who go well beyond their due dates and need to be induced, and then have long and difficult labors, it was like my body knew exactly what to do, even though it hadn’t done it before.  And, yes, I do plan to use Hypnobabies to prepare for any subsequent births (I figure I’ll do all this again once more in a few years)…and I’d recommend the program to others as well.